Check out our collection of the Sex quotes for him and her. We’ve compiled a list of dirty and funny phrases and sayings. Scroll Down
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In the duel of sex woman fights from a dreadnought and man from an open raft.
H. L. Mencken
“I want to capture you, like this, and freeze it forever.”
“Roses are red, Violets are blue, I’m using my hand but I’m thinking of you.”
Sex Quotes
“Software is like sex: it’s better when it’s free.”
Linus Torvalds
I think same sex couples should be able to get married.
Barack Obama
Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn’t!
George Bernard Shaw
“Push me up against the wall and do dirty things to me.”
“Ten men waiting for me at the door? Send one of them home. I’m tired.”
Mae West
For flavor, instant sex will never supersede the stuff you have to peel and cook.
Quentin Crisp
You know, God, the power that makes life, whatever it is, had just to make two things, masculine and feminine, for all this mischief. And made them so there is this entirely different point of view about love and sex.
Beatrice Wood
Sex is more exciting on the screen and between the pages than between the sheets.
Andy Warhol
‘Sex’ is as important as eating or drinking and we ought to allow the one appetite to be satisfied with as little restraint or false modesty as the other.
Marquis de Sade
“Your face would look better between my legs.”
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.
W. C. Fields
I do earnestly wish to see the distinction of sex confounded in society, unless where love animates the behaviour.
Mary Wollstonecraft
“Your clothes would look nice on my bedroom floor.”
Sex Quotes
I am an artist, art has no color and no sex.
Whoopi Goldberg
“Be naked when I get home.”
Sex Quotes
I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.
Gore Vidal
Sex hasn’t been the same since women started enjoying it.
Lewis Grizzard
“Your pants, they bother me. Take them off!”
Sex Quotes
When you get to fifty-two food becomes more important than sex.
Tom Lehrer
Sex appeal is the keynote of our civilization.
Henri Bergson
“Kiss me hard & fuck me harder!”
Sex Quotes
Bedroom Funny Jokes
- Our cat sleeps between us. We call her the Tiny Chaperone.
– Emily Claire Tamblyn - Give a man a free hand and he’ll try to put it all over you.
– Mae West - The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
– Brendan Behan - Wilt Chamberlain had sex with 10,000 women, but how many of them did he truly love?
I would say 3,000 at most.
– Sean O’Connor - There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL.
– Lynn Lavner - My girlfriend always laughs during sex, no matter what she’s reading.
– Emo Philips - Before casual sex, it’s best not to mention to your partner that you might want to do a little tweeting afterward.
– Greg Tamblyn - Sex is a two-way treat.
– Franklin P. Jones - If God’s got anything better than sex to offer, he’s certainly keeping it to himself.
– Sting - Don’t bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.
– Fran Liebowitz - My sex life is very bad. If it weren’t for pickpockets I’d have no sex life at all.
– Henny Youngman - In Germany police are searching for a woman who holds men at gunpoint and forces them to have sex with her. Actually the gun isn’t for the sex, it’s to keep the guy around later to make him cuddle.
– Jay Leno - Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
– Groucho Marx
